The Science of Sleep and Relationships

By now, we should all know that sleep is crucial for our physical and mental health. But did you know that sleeping with your partner can positively impact your mental health, overall well-being and even your sleep? The quality of our sleep is intricately connected to various factors, and we often forget how much our sleep can be affected by things that, at first glance, may appear unrelated. For example, the state of our relationships.

Sleeping with your partner can positively impact your mental health, sense of security, overall well-being and even your sleep. There is evidence to suggest that sleeping with a partner can increase REM sleep in addition to sleep quality and time spent asleep.

On the flip side, however, when there is significant relationship stress (such as conflict or unresolved issues) then sleep satisfaction is often impacted. And this works both ways. Some research shows that those in relationships who consistently experience poor sleep and have less restful nights are also more likely to engage in conflict with their partners. Sleep loss also decreases the level of empathetic accuracy – meaning people might be less able to understand or interpret their partners’ feelings. This makes sense as we know that good quality sleep is vital for emotional processing and mental well-being.

Sleep can be disrupted by many things:

• The biggest disruptor of sleep is often the partner’s snoring - If your bed partner snores, it may be worth visiting a sleep specialist with them - snoring is one of the risk factors for sleep apnoea, and the bed partners of snorers are known to have less sleep than bed partners of silent sleepers. It may also be worth considering earplugs to help you and your partner get a good night’s sleep together.
• Understanding and respecting each other's chronotypes can play a pivotal role in optimizing sleep quality within a relationship. Chronotype refers to an individual's biological predisposition to be more alert and active at particular times of the day. While one partner may naturally be a morning person, inclined to wake up early, the other might identify as a night owl, feeling more energetic during the evening. To ensure that both partners experience restorative sleep, it is crucial to acknowledge and accommodate these biological differences. Establishing a sleep schedule that aligns with each person's chronotype can foster a harmonious sleep environment. This might involve compromising on bedtime routines, finding shared activities during periods of overlap in energy levels, or creating a bedroom space that caters to both early risers and night owls.
• Finally, the problem may be as simple as an old mattress or struggles sharing a duvet. The goal is to create a sleep environment that is comfortable for both of you. Investing in a mattress that is designed for both of you may be an easy step to reducing sleep disruptions if it’s your partner’s tossing and turning giving you sleepless nights. Some couples sleep much better when they use two separate duvets as opposed to one. New sheets and new pillows may also help you feel more comfortable and fall asleep faster. Choosing the perfect mattress to get your best sleep can sometimes feel overwhelming. Dial•a•Bed has every conceivable level of support and comfort that will be just right for you. Find your nearest Dial•a•Bed store at www.dialabed.co.za. Then pop by and chat through your options with an experienced sleep consultant.

Sleep discussions are important for maintaining a healthy sleep partnership. While the current social assumption is that couples sleep together, sleeping apart may work better for some. Talk to your partner about what type of sleeping arrangement they feel most comfortable with. Finally, avoid going to bed angry or harbouring unresolved conflicts. Engaging in open and honest communication to address issues before bedtime can prevent the build-up of stress that might disrupt sleep.